Saturday, August 1, 2009

as though I'm all that you can see

I despise commitment.
I am headstrong.
I thrive on inconsistency,
But hate change when initiated by someone other than me.

Telling me you love me means you want something to change.
It means you want something more to grow.
It could be the difference between having me one day, and not knowing where I am the next.

I hate commitment.
I run at the first sign of it.
So don’t ever tell me you love me.
Not only will it trigger a change that I fear so much, but also cause me to misunderstand.

I mean, how can I? How can I understand how you could possibly love someone like me? Someone so selfish and self-absorbed. Someone who has more faults and flaws than ever thought possible. How? How can you love someone with imperfections beyond belief? How can you look at me and promise forever, when you don’t even know if I’ll still be here tomorrow?

How can you give someone who destroys everything they touch, the most fragile part of your being? How?

Don’t tell me you love me.
Right now, I’m just not worth it.

Maybe someday.
Someday.

4 comments:

  1. it's as if you peeked into my soul and wrote what you saw. i hate commitement just as much as i hate being far away from you.

    x

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  2. :) you make me want to steal my papa's credit card and buy a ticket to Canada.

    ...I don't even think I like Canada ! hahahha

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  3. well darling, you must like it. because i live there now. and how are we to be lovers if you don't like where we live?

    makes sense no?

    x

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  4. every sense in the world :) I officially adore Canada, hahahha.

    ReplyDelete